In the article Carl Brashear, ‘Men of Honor’ diver, dies at 75 the author talks about how great of a man Carl was. He was a great Master Sea Diver, especially considering all of the things that he had to go through to get there. Throughout his journey Carl was faced with racist bosses. He was forced to do things 10X harder than any white man had to do. But yet he prevailed and was one of the greatest Master Sea Divers ever.
In my opinion what Mr.Brashear had to go through was absolutely ridiculous, from the beginning he was just as good as everyone in training if not the best. But yet he had to go though things that nobody else had to just to prove him self. They tried to make him quit many times by doing things to his tools, or his sleeping habits. But through it all he never quit he pushed through everything and won.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14031320/ns/us_news-life/t/carl-brashear-men-honor-diver-dies/#.TyWVSvkiHjU
Kylie,
ReplyDeleteI think this is a wonderful example of perseverence in the face of great challenge.
You've done a nice job of summarizing the article, and of stating your opinion in the beginning of the second paragraph. Three out of the 5 Cs (Clear, Concise,Complete) are well represented here.
I'd like to see more of your voice shine through the facts (Creative). Be wary of starting sentences with but or but yet (a bit redundant), and try adding a bit more detail to your sentences to express your voice. (Correct)
and don't forget to use the editing feature on the blog to correct that 4th C, correctness (e.g., himself, commas after introductory clauses......argh......)
ReplyDeleteBring your own experience of putting up with adversity and not quitting to add that "voice."
This article was really touching, and inspired me to continue to work towards my own dreams and goals.
ReplyDeleteThis shows even though he was put through racism he kept on going to reach his goal of being a diver and that racism didn't even stop him. Some of your own examples of how you got through a job even though the boss made it harder would have worked.
ReplyDeleteIt just goes to show that regardless of racism, you can still be a master sea diver
ReplyDelete